As he walks to the bar made up in a three-piece and bowler hat, your eyes lock and every 50 shades of grey scene flashes before your eyes. You realise that perhaps your Red Room is a bedroom with an old lava lamp. But no matter, you have a pornstar martini to hand, a lustful elixir of passion in a bottle.
You open the bottle and sip. Like it was crafted by Casanova himself, it announces itself on your tongue. Bold, charismatic and full of vigour, the premium Absolut Vodka, Passoa, and fresh passionfruit puree invigorates you with a youthful lust before the fresh lime cuts through and brings you back into the room.
With new found charisma, you stride to the bar, winking and making finger guns at anyone who’s drawn to your presence. Cool. You take a seat beside him and whisper ‘Are you my appendix? Because I don’t know anything about you but this feeling in my gut is telling me that I should take you out’
He Laughs and turns to the barman. Two Pornstar Martinis, please. And run a tab, we could be here a while.
You win. Suck it Christian Grey.